Manweekend

Man Weekend 2002 officially started at midnight between Thursday and Friday when it was discovered that there was no more beer in Tobey cottage fridge. You’ve never seen such a group of suddenly wide-awake, sober, serious, and somber Men in all your life. Then Ty remembered about two cases in his van and, after the Men swore a collective oath to never let such a thing happen ever again, levity was restored. In accordance to tradition no one but Richard tried to get any sleep that night and in further accordance to tradition Richard was kept awake by the loud laughter of the other Men at his folly.

The weather was excellent and the lake level was high. Weeds, and therefore fish, were found on the other side of the bay but while several sizeable fish were sighted the catch was almost all of the smaller variety not worthy of further mention. There were several independent navigations of the Safari route. The boat situation was enhanced by the timely and almost accidental acquisition, by the Men of the Edgewood cottage, of the Red Rocket, a boat comparable to the Ty-tanic in all respects save perhaps in the area of cleverness of name. All boats ran wonderfully which does not bode well for next year. There’s nothing that angers the Boat Gods more than being pleased with one’s boat.

Uncle Bud served in the capacity of Senior Man. Other welcome First Men were Uncle Bud’s fucking new son Alex, Allen’s friends McAnus, Ian, Patrick, and (finally) Sean; Condom’s friend Rich, Richard’s neighbor Dennis (who made an afternoon appearance at Man Weekend 2001), and David’s son Justin and his friend Paul. May they always return.(Someone’s going to have to convince Justin that he really was here however because he doesn’t remember any of it.)

Glenn awed and amazed all of Highgate by simplifying his massive production of Man-worthy consumables and frying everything. The Man Mess starred two fried turkeys. As Glenn was packing up his frying infrastructure he carefully poured the then rather experienced oil back into the jugs from whence it came and promised to bring it back again next year. Thus is the stuff of Man Weekend traditions.

Returning Man Weekend 2001 participants were presented tee shirts with Allen’s “2001: A Man Odyssey” logo. The leading candidate so far for vintage 2002 tee shirts is Charles’ “Worried Turkey” logo. (“Worried Turkey” would be a great name for a whisky.)

After dinner the Men made the traditional sacrifice to the Boat Gods and took care of the rest of the Sea Nymph in the Ridge grill. Ned donated a quantity of kiln-dried hardwood scraps and was rewarded when Emma Gove thought that the whole hillside had caught fire. The butane lighter fuel explosion video is destined to become the weekend’s definitive documentary record. This year’s sacrifice produced pounds and pounds of melted aluminum nuggets in elaborate geometric patterns, as opposed to the few ounces produced last year. Already major metropolitan art museums have made inquiries to obtain specimens of these rare works.

Photographs of this year’s event will be posted you-know-where as they clear the Man Weekend censorship committee. The committee takes its work very seriously so those of you with unpublished imagery please forward it to the Man Weekend Webmaster with confidence. You can rest assured that only the most embarrassing and incriminating pictures will be made public worldwide.

Man Weekend 2003 will be held on the now-traditional weekend two weeks after Memorial Day. The theme, meat, and sacrifice are yet to be determined and suggestions are welcome. As always Man Weekend 2003 participation is not obligatory. We already have a catalog of stories (lies) to tell about any fools who fail to show.